I took a fresh pack of Luckies
And a mint called Sen-Sen
My old man’s Trojans
And his Old Spice after shave
—Early 1980s Billy Joel knows how your Valentine’s Day should’ve gone down

I took a fresh pack of Luckies
And a mint called Sen-Sen
My old man’s Trojans
And his Old Spice after shave
—Early 1980s Billy Joel knows how your Valentine’s Day should’ve gone down
Sigh.
—via malcology
Doll #31
“The Driver”, Drive
“Valentine Abbey” by Chad Thomas
—via
Gotye: “Somebody that I Used to Know”
I adore this track and it might be my new favorite “Things are being drawn onscreen during the song”-style video since A-ha’s “Take on Me”.
SORRY, NORWEGIANS.
I must have this.
“During these last months the King walked with death as if death were a companion, an acquaintance whom he recognized and did not fear. In the end death came as a friend, and after a happy day of sunshine and sport, and after “good night” to those who loved him best, he fell asleep as every man or woman who strives to fear God and nothing else in the world may hope to do.”
Woke up with Tilda Swinton hair.
Who DOESN’T start their day with a backpack full of chocolate milk?
I’m one of the few people on the planet who have—so far—been immune to Angry Birds, in all of its forms or incarnations. That doesn’t mean that I wouldn’t NOM NOM NOM my way through a plate of these cupcakes though.
—via
“What I’d really like to do is something extraordinary. Something big. Something mega. Something copious. Something capacious. Something cajunga! But I’ll probably end up working at Great America, mopping up hurl and lung butter.”
I rarely pay more than $20 for a bottle of wine because I don’t always appreciate the depth and subtlety of the flavors and also because I drop the bottle in the parking lot and have to stand there awkwardly staring at the spill while I debate whether it’s worth licking the concrete for.
#FMM (Fuck my Malbec)
“George Clooney really is nice looking.”
“Is it hard to play the ukulele?”
“Language!”
“I guess with her mom in the hospital, no one can brush Scotti’s hair.”
“He has a lot of shoes for a Hawaiian. Those look like loafers.”
“He runs like a doofus.”
“If my daughter talked to me like that, I’d have two family members in the hospital”
“Is Scotti a nickname?”
“That boy has a Joker mouth.”
“He was probably always really nice looking.”
“THAT’S A PLOT POINT.”
“Which Bridges is that?”
“Do they call them Hawaiian shirts in Hawaii? Or just ‘shirts’?”
“He must not be a very good lawyer.”
“I don’t like to run on the sand.”
“Now he’s barefoot.”
“Do those flowers dissolve in the water?”
[Ten straight minutes of body-wracking sobs]
“Are we ever going to find out Scotti’s real name?”
[Another five minutes when she’s openly weeping and saying “Oh Lord, Oh Lord, Oh Lord”]
“He can really do sad.”
[Continued sniffles]
“That might have been better than The Help”
A circa-1962 Andy Warhol buying creamy, delicious cans of inspiration.
—via