September 2010
95 posts
5 tags
Pro Cycling, Tainted Meat and You →
Although it remains on the list of banned substances for every major sports league, the NCAA and the Olympics, it’s difficult to believe that cocaine was once considered a performance-enhancing drug. After spending the morning chewing on the end of my pen and ramming my eyebrows into each other, I could only come up with three examples of careers that were improved by that particular...
Breaking Even
Bad News: The pound cake you made to share with your boyfriend is essentially inedible because you got so wrapped up in today’s deadline that you forgot to set the oven timer.
Good News: Hopefully he’ll love this freshly baked doorstop.
Better News: The key lime pie couldn’t be more perfect if George Clooney had been zested into the filling and the sweet potatoes are so good,...
What is Controversy? →
The fact is that if Jeopardy! removed all the sports clues because it had a sportswriter or a sports fan on the show that day, it would actually be an unfair (and, hence, illegal) disadvantage to that contestant. If you wanted to, you could find an agenda in every game, because, with sufficient knowledge of the contestants’ lives, there will always be categories that will favor one of them over...
Michael Vick's New Lease on Life →
When jazz age novelist and frequent ascot wearer F. Scott Fitzgerald died in 1940, he left behind an Intervention-worthy drinking problem, an institutionalized former wife and a stack of disorganized notebooks that a well-meaning editor would later assemble into his final novel. On one yellowed page, he bitterly scrawled “There are no second acts in American lives,” which works as an...
“Nothing is as obnoxious as other people’s luck.”
– F. Scott Fitzgerald
Is there already a country song called "I Forgot...
Because if not, I’ll be spending the morning writing one.
Fear & Loathing in the Form of a Question →
Maybe it was because I stopped my shopping cart before it crashed into a stranger’s Miata. Maybe it was because I bought ninety pounds of Butter Lite popcorn from an undersized Boy Scout. Maybe it was the courtesy flush. As the commercial break began, I stood behind an electronic podium wondering what I’d ever done to deserve this, to earn “Sports & The Media” as my...
“You know, Italians don’t wear tartan.”
– —My mother
Arlo Guthrie: “City of New Orleans”
“I’m pretty sure Jelisa had a thing for Blomqvist.”
– —From one of the Jeopardy! message boards I scanned this morning. This made me laugh, even though I should probably be borderline offended, since I have yet to set a relative on fire/spend time in an institution/wear leather pants.
I’ve read several threads, partially because...
Google Me, Baby
For those of you who have searched for “Jelisa Castrodale + sportswriter”, you can find an archive of my columns for NBC Sports - Out of Bounds here.
For the two people who Googled “How old is Jelisa Castrodale?”, you’re on your own. And for the person in Coeur d’Alene, Idaho who typed “Jelisa Castrodale + hot”, I think I love you.
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Massive Attack: “Teardrop”
The season...
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Ever Go Through A Phase Where Every Penny You Find...
That’s what my life feels like right now.
I dig it.
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Hate Mail is the Best
Subject: Articly about Ines Sainz - you are an idiot
You mam are an idiot. I spent many years trying to take myself seriousely. This cheap piece of crap (going for publicity) knew what she was doing. Do not demene women with you PATHETIC try to justify this slut. You are an embarassment to women who do their job professionally. You really need a reality chech about how life is in the real...
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