…As a Boston fan, I know that no fan base wallows in the yellowed pages of history like we do. As a group, we aren’t known for our optimism or sunny outlook; we’re more Bucky Effin’ Dent than Norman Vincent Peale. But that’s because we know that if there’s any team capable of breaking our hearts, it’s the Boston Red Sox.
On Aug. 31, Boston led the AL East by 1.5 games over New York and had won seven of 10. Then they flipped to the next page on their J.D. Drew Scowl-A-Day calendar, they dropped nine of 11 and are slogging through a 5-game losing streak, baseball’s longest current Suckfest.
Don’t panic? I’m not panicking, I always breathe through an empty Dunkin’ Donuts bag.
What, me panic? Just because Boston’s lead in the Wild Card race has withered to 3, with 16 regular season games remaining for the Sox and the surging Rays?
Or because in September, Tampa’s pitchers are averaging 7 innings per start while Boston’s averaged just over 4? (And no Sox starter has lasted longer than 5 innings since September 6)
Or because tonight Tim Wakefield is making his 157th attempt at getting his 200th win?
Or because the Sox have more four games against the Rays and have a 5-9 record (1-4 Home) against them this year? Or because Tampa has outscored Boston 72-43?
Of course not. I always use Xanax as a pizza topping. What makes you think I’m panicking?
(But you could click HERE for the rest of this week’s column.)
